I think I have CAUGHT the Tinkler! So, I am in the bathroom stall and you know when you are bout ready to...well...go and then someone walks in and it is like no matter that you are just needing to go numero UNO...God stuffed the straw of life in your bladder and sucked it back up. Seriously God? I was SO almost there. So you wait till your bladder is at that point again and uhp...there goes the door again.
Clearly I needed to focus on something else, so why not the stall next to me! No I am not a peepee peeper, by no means am I. But, have you ever noticed other people's rituals. Mine for instance is, close door, paper cover, pants and sit. THIS person next to me took it wayyyy out perportion. i could hear the paper cover...shuffle shuffle. then...toilet paper? Being lined ON TOP of the paper cover. more shuffling. Shoe appears...so some bracing is going on. And then it happened. No sitting noise. none what so ever. And then the shower faucet was turned on and you could her the splatter. toilet paper and flush.
I waited a minute, trying not to judge. Trying not to GAG. Went about my business of course AFTER the supposed Tinkler had fled and peeked in the stall next to me. There it was...The Tinkler attacked. The stall a mess. I wanted to write a note on the bathroom stall walls. It would state,
" Dear Tinkler... YOU...YEA YOU! you did it again. you managed to cover the whole stall in toilet paper and paper covers and then you unleashed your beast and managed NOT TO HIT ANY TOILET PAPER. You did however hit everything within the 5 mile radius of your bum. SO gross man. Im on to you. You wear white sneakers with funky green laces. I'll find you..."
I didn't though. But, I did tell the cleaning lady there was a yellow light special on isle 4.
France won the World Cup and all I got was a lesson in how to chill out - On Sunday I befriended a 20-year-old French kid named Etienne while sitting on the concrete railing of a walkway leading down to the Seine. We were gathere...